Saturday, January 11, 2014

Dis Right Hur Is 'Muricah!


Yesterday was so overwhelming with experience and culture shock that I couldn’t even muster the energy to sit down and write. Not to mention I was away from my laptop from almost the second I got home from school until 12:00 that night. The reason posts are coming out about every other day, instead of every day, is each post is about 12 pages in size 11 font in Microsoft word. I have to proof-read them all at least twice, I have to add pictures, and I have to experience all the things that I blog about before I can blog about them which is equally as time consuming.






I met a character yesterday, whom I will profile today, that rendered me completely unable to do anything but process that Quinter, Kansas, and the people in it, actually exist.

But before I delve into the rich fertile writing soil Kansas and it’s many distinguished Kansan’s have to offer, let me say this:

I really need to work on my transitioning skills.

My entire life I have been driven to school. So there wasn’t really a time crunch. I could wake up, and leave when I was ready. Now I take the school bus. I don’t know if it’s because I come from a really “‘lax” culture, or what, but things happen very suddenly here. For instance… You could be sitting in Caitlyn’s kitchen, watching the dogs roll around like seizure patients, when all of a sudden you hear “Bus is here!” You blink, both Collin and Caitlyn are already sitting on the bus. Meanwhile, you are panicking inside. You are speeding through your mental checklist like a NASCAR racer, and miraculously you manage to pack up your entire bag and be out the door in 30 seconds, when (if you’re like me at least) you stop and realize…

You aren’t wearing any shoes.

If this is the case, if your morning plays out anything like mine did, you will sprint back into the garage which will be pitch black and be frantically feeling around on the ground in the dark for your shoes. You will try to put them on in the dark on the garage, and eventually realize you aren’t stuffing your feet into your black knee high lace up boots, but the rain boots of an 11 year old boy. Once you correct this blunder and find your shoes, you remember that they have laces and zippers. This will compel you to grab your shoes and run barefoot through the snow onto the bus because you don’t know anything about “bus culture” and are too scared it will leave without you.



That was my morning.
Or at least the start of my morning.

Once on the bus, I sat down in the first available seat. I look over and realize I just nearly squashed a little blonde 4 year old to death. She seems unfazed. “Hi.” She says, smiling to expose her alarming lack of teeth (I forgot kids lose teeth. Luckily my recoiling in disgust was showing only in my brain, not on my face.) She looked at me up and down obviously confused. “Hey! Lady” She asked me. “Yah?” I said, trying to be friendly and none threatening. “Did you know you’re not wearing any shoes?” I laughed hysterically, this confused her more. “Let me show you! This is what you’re supposed to do with them.” She pointed to my boots in reference to “them” then pointed to her light up sneakers. “See. The laces are to hold them on your feet.” She explained, with a very serious look on her face. She then went on to inform me my phone case is too scary to take out in public, and then go off on a tirade about, I kid you not, the declining quality of juice these days. I love this small blonde person.

I’m a bit hesitant to post a picture of her, as she’s young and I don’t know her family at all, so I’ll paint a picture with words.
She was wearing a little hair bow in her straight little blonde hair. She had a purple knit-cap that she kept putting on and taking off, she had really high up socks, and as aforementioned, light up sneakers.
She doesn’t have any front teeth, or many back teeth either, which gives her an adorable baby-doll lisp. I don’t know her name because when I asked it she responded, “That’s not important.”



Also, all the little girls I’ve seen wear these adorable super long skirts with corduroy or polka dot patterns. These skirts are really long. It’s like they’re wearing entire linen set around their waste. I at first thought this was a fad or a style choice. I chose to only wear dresses from 2nd through 6th grade, so it wouldn’t have surprised me. Wrong again. They’re so devoutly Christian that they are forbidden to wear pants because they’re women. I didn’t think that ever happened anymore (save that one crazy cat lady from Ohio who was on wife swap who wouldn’t let her daughters wear pants.) That’s really great for me to be aware of, I knew in the back of my mind that super conservative Christians were out there, but I had no idea that entailed anything else besides saying grace, attending church, and all that stuff. I basically thought it meant a lot of extra praying. Apparently a large portion of the world reads the Bible before they go to sleep every night. I had no idea this was a thing.

I have found myself saying, “Is that really a thing?” A lot over these past few days. It all started off around the time of the corndog, and then kept going from there. Most recently I learned Bobbi…

Oh wait! Another few redactions!!

Bobbi spells her name with just an “I” no “E”. Bobbi, not Bobbie. Also the deer Collin shot wasn’t a caribou it was a red stag. Also, I was wrong about K-State tuition. It’s $1600 per semester, not for the whole year. Hahaha, oops.

Bobbi's amazing locker all prettified

Her matching K-State outfit of Friday



Anyways…

Pretty bird she drew
Bobbi sticks her gum behind her ear when she isn’t chewing it. Yes, that is a thing. I like Bobbi too much to share my thoughts on that.
Bobbi is trying to sign up for a network trip to Putney, so let’s get excited!!!!!!!!!!

Another thing that I just don’t understand with the transitioning is the bell system. As I’ve mentioned before I’ve never been in a school with a bell. Every school I’ve attended has run on island time, you know, “We’ll get there when we get there” type thing. For instance, in middle school, sometimes I would hand in a paper and wouldn’t get it back for a month, maybe two. Or I would take a 6th grade math test, and sometime in the middle of 7th grade I would find out the score I got on that test.



At Putney I get things handed back right away and usually with thorough comments and descriptions, but class isn’t at an exact time, like at Quinter, the classes go from super exact times, like 11:47 to 12:59. The bell rings at 11:47 to start and 12:59 to end and when the bell rings to start everything starts and when it rings to end everything ends, really suddenly. At Putney class starts “around 12:30.” You get to class sometime between 12:20 and 12:45. All the technical kinks get worked out, (copying extra papers, last minute printing, running back to your dorm for a book, etc.) and things get going when they get going. This is what I am used to.

Here, the bell rings and everyone is out of the classroom before the ringing stops (the ring is an average of 10 seconds.) This was at first very flustering for me. Because you have all of your stuff out on your desk until the end of class, even though there is a 10 minute bell to alert you that class is almost over. But everyone packs up and is gone in a split second. Because after the bell rings, you only have a certain time to get to your next class before you are late. If I’m a few minutes late, I usually can say something like, “Sorry I was coming all the way from Reynolds” or “New Wing’s printer wasn’t working.” Here, if you’re late you’re marked late and I don’t know specifically what happens (they aren’t keep track of that for me as I am a network student.) But when that bell goes off, especially over the first few days, I sprint to my next class like I have a bomb vest strapped to my chest. I am in full drive. In short, I’m still getting used to the bell.

I saw Collin ride his 4-Wheeler today before I got lost in my host family’s house. Before I tell you about that, let me start by saying Collin has a really sick 4-wheeler that he drives really great, and an epic helmet with silver skulls on fire.



Anyways… I lived a freaky scene from a horror movie in real life.
When they said their business was at their house, I didn’t really think much about it. I assumed they ran the business from their house, like had a home office. No. No not at all.

Collin asked if I wanted to see his 4-Wheeler. I told him I definitely did. While I was putting my shoes on, he took off. So I started walking in the direction it looked like he’d gone in to try to catch up with him.

Understand, the level of naivety this took me, to forge out into a dark corner of their house having no idea where I was going. It’s like when you see someone in a horror movie, and they hear something in their basement, and they go down alone without turning on a light or telling anyone else where they’re going, to investigate. That’s how absolutely brainless this decision was of me.

I walked through a dark room filled with boxes and stuff, found a door, pushed on it, and BAM. I was in a giant storage warehouse with a tractor and an RV and tons of pick up trucks, and it stretched on FOREVER. 



There was a scary giant spiky green thing, and then a giant metal garage door. I looked behind me to go back, but there were 4 doors and I had no clue which one I had gone through, and all the rooms were dark, so I couldn’t look in and see if I recognized anything.
I figured, “Why don’t I just go into one at a time until I find my way out?
I’ll tell you why. Because, again, the rooms were totally completely dark. So I would have no idea if I was in the right room because dark looks the same everywhere in Kansas. Not only was I uneasy about going into a dark room in a strange house with all these extra extensions no one had formally mentioned before, but also I realized—what if I went through a door in the crazy dark room thinking it would get me back to the house, and it was another crazy dark room? Then I would be lost in a never ending string of crazy dark rooms.
Also…Terra or Tom or Caitlyn or Collin if you’re reading this I apologize. But since I was so flustered, I didn’t really remember they had this huge chemical business. So my first thought about why they must have all these big vehicles and extra giant space was, (and remember at the time I was so panicked that this seemed completely logical to me)
The only explanation could be…

They’re serial killers who live in the middle of nowhere so people won’t suspect anything or know where to look for the victims, and the big dark rooms were for tying them up and torturing them like in the movie Saw, before they eventually killed them and stored them somewhere on the property.



Once I was reached this conclusion and believed in it with unshakable certainty, my adrenaline levels shot through the roof. I was going all over their giant warehouse space looking for a way out. When all of a sudden, the garage door, the HUGE garage door opened. Which meant I wasn’t alone. My first instinct was to run for the garage door because it was a way outside where maybe, just maybe, someone would hear my screams. I was running for the door when I heard a noise that sounded exactly like a chainsaw. (It may be worth mentioning I watched every Saw movie ever made, all 8 of them, consecutively without sleeping for 24 straight hours in 7th grade.) I thought the end was in sight. 




Nope. It was the sound of Collin tearing past on his dirt bike. But he was gone before I could ask him where I was or how to get back. I ran out of the garage door before it could close, and boom! I was staring down the menacing grill of a MACK TRUCK. These quiet mid-western people had like 50 cars and a MACK TRUCK in the back of their crazy expansive house I hadn’t heard anyone talking about before, and I lost it and I don’t even know how I ended up where I ended up next. But I found myself with a ton of GIANT tanks filled with what I could only assume in my totally irrational panicky state, were decomposing bodies.

Then I saw crazy giant huge gasoline holding containers, the kind that look like soup cans. They were painted a devilish bright red. This incited yet another panic because there’s always freaky colored stuff in horror movies, like randomly placed giant red soup cans of gasoline in the people you’re living with’s backyard, and this freaky colored thing is super flammable and could explode and I took off.
I don’t really know how I got to where I got to next, but I found myself surrounded by cats. 



I had seen cats roaming around their property before, but I didn’t recognize any of these cats. So of course, my first thought, “OMFG THEY’RE CAT HOARDERS. THEY’RE SERIAL KILLER CAT HOARDERS!!!!” So here I am in this frenzied state with all these cats, there were 6 where I was and Collin drove by and told me they had EVEN MORE cats than just the ones I had seen. Plus I had already seen a ton of cats walking around besides these cats. But since I finally found Collin he finally showed me how to get back in inside, and it turned out crazy cat alley was only like 2 feet from the front door and I was too crazed to realize it.

In retrospect, I realized they have their entire huge chemical company at their house. I also realized if I hadn’t been so worked up (I was already exhausted and in a state when I embarked on this part of my day) I would have realized Collin drove by me like ten times, and I didn’t even realize it. I also realized that they had a ton of people working at their business and if I had realized that I could have stopped and asked any one of them how to get back inside. They aren’t cat hoarders or serial killers. They have lots of warehouses for all their business stuff, and they only have like 6 or 7 cats and the cats live outside. I just didn’t recognize the cats because I hadn’t seen them up close. So yah. That was my first experience looking at the rest of their house.

Collin’s 4-Wheeler is actually pretty sweet though. I have an epic video of him driving it out of the giant garage from after I had gotten my bearings and had the nerve to return to crazy giant warehouse of corpses and death. Check out the video, you’ll know why I suspected it to be a chainsaw.



I have a new favorite food. I tried canned grapefruit for the first time. 64oz Del Monte Sugar Free Grapefruit Segments to be exact. And I love them. It’s all of the grapefruit flavor with none of the grapefruit peeling and poking at it with the maniacal sharp spoon and all the other unpleasantries associated with grapefruit preparation. It’s the grapefruit pink flesh without any of the white part. It’s heavenly. 



I also learned there is a completely different line of sodas or “pop” as they say in Kansas J That they don’t sell in the Northeast. The one I encountered was Squirt. It’s really good. It’s like a mountain-dew flavor accept it’s white. Lemon lime soda, but extra fruity.



We had it with pizza from the pizza station, which I really hope we eat at again before I leave. I need to find a good place to take my host family to dinner, so any Western Kansans who are reading this, let me know if you have any thoughts.

I’m going to talk about the rest of yesterday’s events backwards, starting with what happened when I returned home from school then going on to talk about what happened when I was at school.

Yesterday was my host family’s company Christmas party, because this was the only time it worked for everyone in the company. It was really sweet. Everyone knew everyone, obviously. It was at a restaurant called Wertz Street Social Emporium. 



The service was eh, the food was eh, and the ceiling looked like it was about to crash down onto my fragile little skull. The memorable part of the evening, however, was I did have a steak for the first time.

When they say "meat and potato" they mean that literally apparently. 


Steak just isn’t my thing. It was also way over cooked, and the bacon it was wrapped in was literally raw. Like, pink. But Terra was incredibly nice and welcoming to me, announcing my presence to everyone in the room, and having them all introduce themselves to me. I ate from the salad bar for the night. 



Then they took pictures, and although I had a double chin in all of them, that was really fun. 



Collin played on my phone for a little while, then it died. So I sat with Caitlyn in the lobby of the restaurant on a really uncomfortable bench that was falling apart. They had a giant bowl of Dum Dum lollipops, Caitlyn had a couple of the blue raspberry ones and they turned her tongue blue. 



I got a butterscotch one, forgot about it, and it melted in my pants pocket. 



For almost three hours after dinner was finished everyone sat around drinking and exchanging stories and Caitlyn and I sat on the bench bitching about guys and talking about how bored we were. When both our phones were dead and we had been sitting around for a good hour or so, we saw the waitress going around passing out refills and we knew we needed to figure out another plan of action. The more tired we got the closer and closer we found ourselves getting to lying on the floor, which you could literally see the dirt on, so we knew we had to come up with a plan of action to end the night, if not for everyone at least for ourselves. Over the next hour of the night here is what we came up with…



-There was a glass window looking into the room where everyone was eating and drinking, we considered “accidentally” breaking the window so we would have to leave in a hurry to avoid being charged for breaking it.

-We thought about pulling a fire alarm, but there wasn’t one.

-Hotwiring a pickup.

-Hitchhiking to The Dollar General for ice cream and 5 hour energy.

-There was a snow shovel and a flag poll in the corner. We thought about Caitlyn taking the shovel, and me taking the flagpole and hitting each other over the head with them at the same time so we would at least have an excuse for being unconscious.

Half the employees of the restaurant actually left before we left, but all in all it was a really fun night. I tried the steak. It was really over cooked. 



It tasted like chewing on that grass in a box you buy for your cat to help with their dental hygiene. Same texture, same amount of chewing involved, same meaty flavor all cats love.



I also tried a corn fritter. I’ve found myself compelled to vomit more in these past 6 days than I have in almost the entire rest of my life combined. I’m going to leave it at that.

Yesterday’s agricultural experience was visiting the grain elevator. I learned a lot at the grain elevator. I’ll talk about all the factual grain stuff first, then I’ll tell you about the person who showed my around the grain elevator, TJ. I got TJ to talk about growing up in Western Kansas, it was absolutely priceless. But first… The cold hard whole grain facts.

Grain Plant


Basically, the grain elevator is a company that ships grains and processes grain and stores grain. Before I start talking about the epic process it takes to get grain from the field to the factory that makes it into cereal or flour or feed, let me say this: I always thought the Cheerio company or the feed company or all those companies had a giant machine that could cut down all the grain and process it in a matter of half an hour. Then it was shipped back off that machine and used in the factories within the week. Wrong again.



It all starts when trucks and trains bring in grains from all around the country. The grains are from farms, and there is a whole elaborate process about growing and harvesting that I don’t feel like getting into right now, mainly because we didn’t really talk about it at all when I visited.
The main commodities the grain company works with are corn, milo, wheat, and soybeans. I was surprised they worked with milo. I had never heard of it before. I was also really surprised they didn’t do much with barley because barley is one of the most common grains. While we’re on the subject it just so happens to be my favorite grain (Hear that Marty! Hear that?! Time to bulk up on barley on the KDU menu!! :D) I also didn’t know soybeans were a grain. I’m still actually pretty skeptical. I always thought soybeans were the little green pods they gave you in Japanese restaurants. I thought they grew like that, all plump and green and salty. Guess not…



Most of their milo goes to local alcohol plants or to be turned into ethanol.

Wheat mostly goes on trains to the East to become flour.

Almost all the corn goes South to become for livestock.

Lots of their grains, all the different types, go to be feed for livestock, as this is an agriculture based economy down here. Lots of the grain going to feed livestock goes specifically to, in TJ’s words, “Raise beef.” I thought this was interesting that he thought of the alive cows as just a step in them becoming beef. This was one of many things he said that gave me an excellent insight into the mind of a born and raised Western Kansan.

They have a lot of safety protocols in place for their grain. I didn’t think there was much of a science to grain, I expected it to, as aforementioned:  be harvested by a big machine, sit in a truck, become flour, cereal, etc. all within a period of two or three weeks. I didn’t think anything could go wrong with it, or that it could go bad, or that the weather or temperature affected it at all.

They have crazy moisture testing, protein analyzing, and there are numerous rules in place for the treatment and prevention of bugs in the grain. After that’s all said and done there’s an endless weighing process. There is a law about how heavy a truck can be for it to drive on the highways. So there are giant scales in the ground at the grain plant. They fill the truck up with grain and they weight the whole truck, with the grain inside. Then the truck dumps the grain into a hole in the ground. Then they weigh just the truck again. That’s how they know how much grain is in the truck.

See the metal bars with light shining on them? Those prevent dust from settling on the grain when it's dumped.


Once the grain is in the truck, the grain plant’s job is done. The next step of the process is to send a report to corporate, and the grain just continues down the line until it ends up in your cabinets in the various forms of grain we use. Basically, what TJ said, “Farmers sell the grain to us to make money, we sell it to a company to make money, they turn it into a product which they sell to make money, and it just keeps goin’ down the line.”

I mentioned earlier there are a lot of different protocols for safety and quality maintenance in place, most of those are centered around keeping the grain bug free. Grain attracts bugs if you leave it sitting too long, whether in the middle of Kansas in giant silos, or in a plastic bag in your basement. Temperature is a big factor in controlling insects, as well as quality.
They take the quality of their grain so seriously that they don’t even use some of their facilities anymore incase their age would affect the quality. The plant was built between the 1930’s and 50’s so some buildings can’t be used for grain anymore and are used as garages instead.
They take the facilities very seriously, not just for grain quality but for customer service. He talked about how they mow so often, when I asked why he said “If you have traffic driving by your house all the time you’re not gonna let the weeds pile up in your yard are you? No, you’re gonna keep everything looking nice. That’s all we’re trying to do here.”

The ideal conditions for storing mass amounts of grain are basically saying, “keep your grain dry” in ten different ways. Not only does this help cut down on insects, but also if your grain is kept in an area that’s moist mold will form.



They have 45 huge storage tubs at the grain plant. They’re like 100 feet tall. They’re known as the “Western Kansas Skyscrapers.” They hold 25,000 bushels of grain each. One bushel of wheat is about 60lbs, corn and milo are 56lbs each for a bushel. I don’t know why the amount that constitutes a bushel differs from grain to grain. I’m assuming it’s because they’re different sizes, like corn is bigger than wheat so it takes less of it to make a bushel, but whatever.
Just so we’re clear, that means one of their 45 tubes ONE of them can hold 1500000lbs of wheat at any given time. That’s 750 metric tons. Which means if they were using all the Western Kansas skyscrapers at once to hold wheat, they would have in their one little middle of nowhere grain plant 6750000lbs or 3375 metric tons of grain. The reason I am including the metric ton measurement is, although most grain plants go by the bushel, if the US Government sells grain they will announce it in metric tons. You’ll never hear on the news “America agrees to sell 56,000 bushels of wheat to Saudi Arabia.” Plus also if Shutong, Fanpu, Jing Jie, or any of my other friends from other countries are reading this then a pound might not mean anything to them.

Now let’s talk about the command central of the grain plant. The board.



This board is a graph of the 45 tubes and what’s in them, and if they’re empty, whether or not they need to be cleaned out. It’s important to keep the board up to date because if they aren’t clear on what is in which tube, and how much of it, grain could get mixed. If they accidentally add too much into one tube, or they think it’s full so they don’t utilize the storage space, it get’s everything all muddled up. Or, worst case scenario, they accidentally mix the grains. If they mix the grains, like accidentally adding corn to soybeans, that means they might not be able to sell it. There’s a slim chance they could sell it to feed yards in this case. Feed yards are where they send the grains that for whatever reason can’t be sold to food companies. For instance, if they let the grains heat up too much, like corn kernels for instance it could damage it. This is called “heat damaged kernels” they can sell these too a feed yard, but the farmers would still need to mix the kernels with something of higher quality or even the hogs wouldn’t eat it.  



How do they get the grains into 100 foot tall tubes you may ask? I asked as well. That is what the grain wheel is for. They put the grain into the little compartments in the wall. Then they set the wheel to where they want the grain elevated too, and then they push a button and up it goes. They used to have an elevator for people, but the insurance company won’t let them take people up in it anymore, unfortunately for me.  

Next we went to the agricultural store. I didn’t even know such a thing existed. The way TJ described it, it’s basically a store for the farming community. I didn’t even really know those existed until I saw the name of the store. 



“Frontier Ag.” Ag, stuck out to me. Because we have a store near us that she shop at for our alpacas called Agway. I always thought that was because it was owned by like Thomas Agway or something, but I guess not. The agricultural store was very cool. They had an entire wall that was just nails. It was like a scene out of King of The Hill. I looked all over it for three penny fluted stainless steel nail (Hank Hill’s favorite nail) but to no avail. They also have an entire section for veterinary supplies, like animal medicines and stuff. The sheep farm people told me they didn’t use veterinarians whenever possible, I guess this is how. They were selling grain there, I’m assuming from the grain plant. 



They also have a whole auto body shop attached to it, as well as a mini storage warehouse. They use the warehouse to keep the tractor and the extra dog food and all the stuff like that, anything that needs to be kept out of the weather, but also isn’t being sold or used right now.
The auto place was actually really cool. They have a machine that strips the rims out of your tires, and a lift for cars.

I had never seen a tire like this before. My first thought was to do what I always saw people do with rimless tires in movies: Climb into it and have someone push me down a hill :D


Then I got to see the back office, where Larry and Janelle work. They were both very friendly. Larry works on “the grain side of things.” He works with the farmers buying and selling. He also does a lot of the pricing. Other people figure where it came from, where they want it to go, and how they’re going to get it there, or “origination.” Janelle is a Renaissance woman. She handles the time cards, she tracks every gallon of fuel, and in TJ’s words “Fixes everybody’s mistakes and handles everybody’s problems.” 

Janelle on left Larry on right.


We talked about sports, I made the mistake of saying I’m a Patriots fan. Apparently they’re in the same conference as Janelle’s favorite team. They asked me what my family did, I told them my mother is an artist and my father works at colleges. When they asked which, I said, “A few, RISD and Harvard mostly.” The response I got was “Oh, Harvard. Ain’t that a smart people school? That’s all we know about it down here is it’s a smart people school.” This made me laugh.
Lastly I met Ryan who works at the front of the store at the register. He looked like a cowboy too, with a hat and everything. TJ said he “Is in charge of your wants and needs regarding feeds.” Ryan does his own ordering and pricing and basically runs the feed part of the store.

Ryan


Before I move on from the factual part: Fun fact…
Terra, the mother of my host family, used to drive a grain truck and stopped at the grain plant many times.

But now that we’ve covered the facts of the grain plant, let’s talk about my spectacular tour guide, TJ.

TJ has lived in Gove County, Kansas his entire life. He grew up in Park, Kansas. One of the thins TJ made me think was that we should send grumpy old people to Western Kansas. You know the kind I’m talking about, the one’s always talking about “Back in my day” and “We need to get back to the good old days.” They never stopped living those days here in Quinter.

TJ



Reading the following italicized paragraphs, please do so envisioning a Southern drawl. Let me set the scene a little first. We were driving down a country road in his white ford pickup (everyone’s pickups look the exact same here. They look like white Ford pickups because they are all white Ford pickups.) He was in the driver’s seat in a tan jumpsuit with a wool hat on, and orange work gloves. He had a face that was tired, but content. He had a can of chewing tobacco, which I found extremely amusing, as I didn’t realize people actually chewed tobacco. He was the physical embodiment of “Joe Shmo” When politicians get up and say “But how will the budget cuts my opponent is suggesting affect the Joe Shmo’s of America?!” They’re talking specifically about TJ. There was nothing but flat Kansas wheat field and clear blue skies for miles on either side of us. We were on our way to Quinter High School.
Remember southern drawl…

I started out by asking him if he liked any movies.

“Oh yah, I like John Wayne movies, got a bunch of ‘em. I’m a John Wayne fan, heck I’m I guess you could say I’m a BIG John Wayne fan. I like that sitcom M*A*S*H (Old time sitcom about the war.) And you know what? I like James Bond. I got an entire collection of James Bond movies too. I really like that Shawn Connery… Don’t know why… Always have."



Next I asked why he worked at the grain plant. 

"Because there's no other feeling in the world like waking up doing a job you love."


Then I just dove right in and I asked TJ if he ever considered leaving Kansas. What he said next will be tattooed in my memory forever.  

“Well yah, I’ve considered it. But then I get to thinking… I don’t know. To me it’s a real good place to grow up. You learn a lot about life, a lot about survival. Back when I was a kid we done a lot of butchering, we processed our own food, cause that was the only way to eat. We weren’t near as crude as those folks in your Western movies who hang a deer or hang a beef[1] and then go cut off a chunk whenever they want one. We processed it, packaged it, and froze it ourselves. I grew up milkin’ cows. If I had to get a cup of milk and feed the cats I could. I grew up raisin’ pigs, farrowing sows, it’s a good life.

‘Nother thing ‘bout out here is you know your neighbors. I got aunts out in Wichita, know the names of the people on either side of them. Don’t know nothin’ else about ‘em though. Down here everybody helps everybody, cause everybody knows everybody. 

Also, I love the wide open spaces here. Where I live down in Collier, I could walk up to any window in any room of my house, bathroom, kitchen, anywhere, and I might see a deer eatin’ grass or comin’ on up to the stock tank for some water. Pheasants in my tree row walking through the yard all the time, got cotton tails hoppin’ all over the place.
One of the reasons we got all this wildlife is ‘cause we don’t have no traffic. Sometimes you can even still play in the streets! ‘Nother good thing about having no traffic is my Mom would take us out before we were even in high school and teach us the principles of driving, out on them back country roads.

I tell you what[2] we get to see some beautiful sunrises and sunsets in the summer time. It just don’t get much better than getting’ to be outside with the stars, and no moon, or with a full harvest moon. I see a more than some other people cause we work ‘til late, especially around harvest time. We could be workin’ from 7 or 8 in the morning until 11 or 12 o’clock at night.
But I ain’t complainin’ I’m happy to do it. Because the farmers, ‘specially around harvest time, want to get the grain out of the ground before the rain comes along because the rain diminishes the quality of their product. Heck, if they get a hail storm that could wipe out an entire field. So we do the work, we put in those extra hours, why? To help our friends and neighbors, because that field of grains, that’s a pay day for them. The seeds they put in the ground, the fertilizer they lay down, the time, the work, the sweat, I’ll do whatever I can to make sure that don’t go to waste.

There was one thing that was always instilled in me back when I was growin’ up. We always had chores to do. Even if you had football practice, basketball practice, in high school, don’t matter. You had to feed the chickens and feed the cows and what have you. Had to get it done. The animals were always fed before we went in for supper, everything that needed to get done was done before we quit for the day. These are people’s livelihoods we’re talking about, and I’ll work as long and as hard as I have to, to make sure they’re taken care of.

I mean it’s not like I hate the city. I’ve been to some cities. Remember once I was in Washington D.C. the Capitol of our nation. I’ve taken some trips with my local game league. I got to go through the white house, see Senate, Congress, the Smithsonian, and those are great places to visit. But even after going out to D.C. for a week I just know I could never keep up with the hustle and bustle.

Down here, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but everybody waves. If you pass someone driving or on the street you put your hand up and wave to them, whether you know ‘em or not. In the city the only time someone waves at you on the road is when you pass them and they… you, you know, tell you “You’re number one.”

Honestly, in D.C. the only place I would go back to see again is Arlington Cemetery. I was there, some odd 20 years ago, but I still remember it. I truly enjoyed my tour of it, ‘cause there’s a lot of American history there. It’s moving, it’s important.

I honestly don’t think I’ll ever move out of Kansas, I’ve got kids in school here, and I… I love Kansas. I love my life here, and it’s the kind of life I want my kids to have.

This is my home. So by God, this is where I’m gonna stay.”

Stunned into silence. Completely.

There’s not really much I can say. I think what TJ had to say speaks for itself.

I’ve never been more proud to be an American.



Thanks for reading, and I really mean that. As someone who aspires to have a career in writing, nothing means more than knowing so many people whom I love and respect are reading what I publish and enjoying it, even though in Kansas everything kind of writes itself!

I’ll leave you with this

The cost of freedom is always high, but Americans have always paid it. And one path we shall never choose, that is the path of surrender, or submission.”
-John F. Kennedy

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